Most people around the country recently finished spring break with their children. Some families head to the beach, others work their way to favorite destinations such as Disney World, and some people opt to visit family in another part of the country. This spring break, I headed down to Alys Beach which is one of the nice housing locations along route 30A in the panhandle of Florida. We had a great time on our vacation, but it made me wonder if the expectations I'm setting for my children are going to be achievable for them in the future.
I tried to spend some time reflecting on spring break when I was a child. Did I ever stay at a fancy private home? NO. Did I ever stay at a Ritz-Carlton or some swanky resort like Atlantis? NO. Did I dine at gourmet restaurants or play golf on top ranked courses? NO. When did the world change where Boomer and Gen X parents had to create the latest and greatest family getaway during spring break?
I can remember going to my grandmother's apartment in St. Petersburg in the 70's and 80's, and the best part about the trip was a pit stop for dinner at the Steak & Ale. I can remember driving by car the one time my parents took me to Disney World. The highlight of the trip was stopping at South Of The Border, but the best we got for lodging was a Holiday Inn about 15 miles outside of the park. More often than not, a great spring break trip was just a day trip to the Jersey shore filled will playing Skeeball and games with cranes plucking out Pez and Tootsie Rolls to chomp on during the day.
Am I bitter that I didn't get these fancy vacations when I was a kid? No, not really because the truth is I didn't know any better. It was the same stuff for the children growing up around me. They didn't have insanely cool vacations either, so I didn't notice the difference.
Remember, I wrote an article a while back about how happiness is around expectations met or unmet. It's important that you set proper expectations around money and provide proper support in order to create a trusting relationship with your children. You may not want to believe that your child is growing up in the 'bubble', but part of the reason they don't gush over staying at a Ritz-Carlton is that many of their peers are experiencing the same thing as well.
One important financial item you might want to add on your strike list is to help your children understand the cost around the vacations and entertainment that you enjoy as a family every year. They don't teach enough of this in school, and certainly you don't want to set your children up for disaster. Admittedly, it's difficult to start staying at a Motel 6 once you've experienced the Four Seasons. You don't know how financially successful your child will be the future, and it may be unrealistic for them (especially in their 20's) to be enjoying the same lifestyle trips you take today when they are working with only 10% to 20% of the income you make today.
There's a reason they want a cooler vacation every year. There's a reason they want to stay at the Ritz-Carlton. You only gain wisdom by your experiences in life.
Written by: Ted Jenkin
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